no longer homeless

I'm curntently liveing in a basement suite, still don't have a computer or internet.

moving hell

so stright up, from  the top.
My Roommates are jerks. we were told to clean the place befor we moved.
What that meant to them,  take thier shit and bolt.
I spent about an hour this morning argueing about that.
Then most my afternoon, doing it myself.....
They took every roll of tolet paper, ie didn't leave anyfor those who are next. (it's polite to leave 2 rolls per bathroom not nessasry, but 1 roll in the entire house would of been better)
Just about anything not nailed down was taken. every stuff i told them was garbage, repeativly.

Now i'm crashing at Runt's place for acouple of days Bored out of my mind. Nothing to do becuase all my stuff is in storage. to broke to drink or get pot. if i want a Smoke i gotta take a walk.

Atleast i'm not at my Dad's.

so anyways

I'm alive. i'm told more alive then ever by runt.... swear runt's on drugs.... ofcourse no one believes me cuase i'm just the crazy drug addict anyways...

anyways I'm out of the folks house, then me and my room mates gotta move due to many eviction notices (3, from different sources, and oddly all perfectly legal all 3) thankfuly it takes me about 3 years to unpack, so only having been here a month i had just books and music unpacked...

moving, moving, moving... fun

on other fronts things apear to be flowing. a few years and numbers will be back to what they were if not who they were.

Moving....

So it's finnally happening. over the next week or so i'll be offline while i move and untill this place gets the internet and i get the computer brad gave me working.... so maybe febuary.
umm yaa wish me luck.

I'm so going to need it

Moxy Fruvous

The drinking song

Gulf War song

lisening to warnings

let me start by saying it's fucking cold....
so cold  i don't want to go for smokes.... i might really quit, pigs might fly.

One long and cold walk down to the store to grab smokes, it rung out clear as a bell. The warning i got from Jared (i think that was his name, i think i made a subway joke or tweelve), 'she'll drop you like a bag of bricks, and you'll look like a bag of bricks hit ya, i sugest to braek it off with her' I didn't trust the guy. ofcourse he had spent a chuck of the night making threats at me so that dosn't improve my opion of anyone. good night otherwise.
A canoe instructer making drity jokes, my groups leader giving me the drity eye as he moved to watch his kid, trying to tell me to behave... same old same old

Friend from school was tring to convince me the trip over tha trust was importent and that i needed to trust someone.i had been drinking alot that year, and he didn't want to see any accedents happen on the fairy trip.which means i was stoned befor i even got to camp and numb to the world. i snaped out of it ran booted out of there.

I was smokeing a joint and about to leave for a bar, she scares the shit out of me and asks if that really where i want to go.

done for now

Sometimes i think it's a sin when i feel like i'm winning when i'm losing again

so gordon lightfoot one of my favorite writers.

I tell lies. alot i'm good at it. I'm tried of it. I won't come clean to all but to those it maters it's always on their face they knew the whole time.

I see it as a game. Me against the truth. the more i strech it  the more points for me. the more i get others to believe the better. If i show i beleive what i say it dosn't matter if it's truth they know i beleive it is which puts doubt in their heads as to what i say. constant keeping to the same lies has made most beleive me, those who think i'm lieing wonder as to what i'm lieing about when befor they were sure.

Somepeople dig their own grave. I think i've dug hole the size of a lake by now and filled it my lies. I dream that i'm at the bottom of the lake trying to swim through my lies to the surface. the moon shinny down my only light. With it i fight to the top every night. But when i reach the top the sun beats fericly down and i swim scared back to the bottom. it's to cold at the bottom to stay and i see things if i sit there to long so i swim back to the surface. it's always a longer trip up then down.

a plan that back fires part 1

Materials:
Myself

Hockey Chick (what can i say she did play a mean game of it, Rugby too)

3 months of time

High School Rumour mill

At work right now the area of the parking lot where people smoke is blocked in by snow, you can only get in though the store. Myself and some guys from work were talking one day about different ways of braking up with a girl. Apparently mine was the worst and because i have time and nothing better to do I'm going to give the longer version, not the full mind you, i don't know it....

So I had just started a new school, (no real surprise for a while it was a different school every month....) and this time it's a bum start. I'm 2 grades behind my age, so they are hitting graduation year and I'm stuck in ten. Friends? the foreign exchange student and Runt...

Runt introduced me to his friends and then kindly asked me to go away.... So i spent the day smoking at the school's pit... end of the day rolls around I sat outside by Runt and his friends seen as we were waiting for the same bus home and read off to the side. Runt's Friends grow to larger group till i get absorbed and am sitting beside a cute brown haired girl very talkative. Had a set of Boobs that screamed over developed...

After awhile me and her became almost attached. It was weird, the girl sliped her hand in mind after acouple of weeks and tells me we are a couple. not many trust me with that kinda thing, left to myself all put off asking a girl for years. i'd put this off 2 months so she made my mind for me...

She was stright forward, to the point and honest, in her own way. had to find out the hard way how old she was.

Febuwary comes around and that's when i'm asked to the office at school. Frist yelling, second silence, third me asking why the yelling? The princpal explains that it would be wrong for a 50 year old to date a 20 year old. I ask how that applies to what. fillanly realiseing i have no clue at what he's talking about he pulls out my file and pulls out Her file. opens them both to the frist page and blocks everything on hers but name and date.

I was born in 1986, She was born in 1992 (if i rember correctly). Apearently the school frowns on this.

The princpal tells me under the sercumstances me and him should have a (and i qoute cuase this i remeber well) 'Man-to-Man talk about the birds and the bees' which really ment me spending an hour convinveing him i would do anything till she was ready (always been my opoin, let them make the frist move, i'm lazy). Had to explain a million things to him about myself, but what finnally convinced him i think is when i told him about scouts. odd that, considering what went on at the camps i went to, he should have been worried.

So i'm unsure what i should do by the end of this all. I'm way to old for her at that time (it being highschool 6 years is huge) was my frist thought, How mature she was my second, wondering what the crap i should do.
 
and that seems like a good point to end the frist bit of this, i started this back in febuary but just still can't the end out right but this nags at me. so i'm puting the frist half

ODST Check.

So after about a month of crawling around New Mombasa's streets.

Runt has Acquired a more powerful machine and given me the old heap of a computer to try and use.

Brutes Everywhere. tend to wander in packs. about 4 to 6 in a pack, but don't get pined in a intersection. that's when they tend to come from all directions, 3 packs of brutes... about 15 in total. some jackals and grunts but one shot from my pistol they go down, brutes can go down in one shot, but you'll need a rocket launcher, fuel rod gun, Spartan laser or a sniper rifle (i think that's all that can, sniper needs a perfect shot to do this) Or if your brave or stupid you can do what i do, run straight at them tossing grenades. 3 frags, one to the left, to the right and behind them, this puts the Brutes closer together. Sticky grenade the Brutes on the edges driving all the brutes closer together. Repeat this with your Spike grenades. Done right you'll be down to about 2 Brutes, Done Better you'll take them all out, Done like me you'll leave 10 of them still alive but in a very small area. Then my friends it's incendiary grenades. Now that's all the grenades it lets you have. the standard weapons to carry are a Pistol and either an assault rifle or a machine gun. Now the brutes are gone. and every thing is a little to quite. That would be to the Hunters comeing up fast behind you. Walking tanks with a green beam of death. They travel in pairs...

Work is feeling more tight. stareing at the keyboard trying to add to that.....

Reading Death Gate Cycle again, i think this makes 6th or 7th time reading them. as normal i wonder if it was the wave correcting itself or if that was the start of a bulge.
And i wonder if my difficults with speech might come from the fact that i never read anything set in the current era.

Really uncomforable moment at work a while back. Freind from highschool came in looking for me in a panic, with her 3 year old red head daughter.... Not mine >.<>.<>.< took a damn week to strighten that mess out. and is about all i can say befor i expoled....


So i'm going to watch an Austrain soap star trun one hit wonder (in north america) and other strage video's i can find

Beware the Internsection....

and then the computer died....

So i borrow a computer from Runt. it's his but i use it when i need one, not often. It died horrible in a blaze of Windows glory.

It's been to weeks and hw talked to his freind the necromancer. Various odd rituals were performed and Bam it is working again. but now that it works i'm not on becuase on tuesday ODST was released.

I'm slowly beating the whole game on the hardest difficulty. I say slowly but mean at a snails pace. i'll proboly post again after i have finsished.

c ya


Edit: Considering it's 5 min later.... i might as well add some random things i've noticed in the last couple of weeks.
I don't lisen to 'scouting songs' anymore. By scouting songs i mean more then songs sung at the fire, I mean all sorts of music that i wouldn't ever hear anywhere eles. Arrogant Worms and Great big sea mostly but Moxy Furios (i hate spelling) and Crash test dummies. Out of those 4 Bands I have 1 CD from Crash test dummies. It's a greatest hits which i lisen to 2 of 12 songs....
so i'm making a note to find some. Maybe that will fill some gaps. Ofcourse that's wishful thinking. It's not knowing why and how some of these things i remeber happened, that is going to drive me crazy. >.< and now i'm censoring myself, I really don't think i know how to be truthful. I aways tell bits and peices. it's part of what's lead to my memory proplems i think.
I watched Greg jump and start running, he was trying to slug me, around 6 years old at the time. Me and Greg were thick as theives our sisters the same way. I learned that day it was possable to do just about anything that needed to happen. some things need to happen for the future to turn out. if things are going astray something ussally corrects this. My understanding was that a human, in truth, had no future. short time on the rock unless you get kicked off early.

Specking of kicked off early we now interupte this random posting with a 1 week ODST marothon.