and then the computer died....

So i borrow a computer from Runt. it's his but i use it when i need one, not often. It died horrible in a blaze of Windows glory.

It's been to weeks and hw talked to his freind the necromancer. Various odd rituals were performed and Bam it is working again. but now that it works i'm not on becuase on tuesday ODST was released.

I'm slowly beating the whole game on the hardest difficulty. I say slowly but mean at a snails pace. i'll proboly post again after i have finsished.

c ya


Edit: Considering it's 5 min later.... i might as well add some random things i've noticed in the last couple of weeks.
I don't lisen to 'scouting songs' anymore. By scouting songs i mean more then songs sung at the fire, I mean all sorts of music that i wouldn't ever hear anywhere eles. Arrogant Worms and Great big sea mostly but Moxy Furios (i hate spelling) and Crash test dummies. Out of those 4 Bands I have 1 CD from Crash test dummies. It's a greatest hits which i lisen to 2 of 12 songs....
so i'm making a note to find some. Maybe that will fill some gaps. Ofcourse that's wishful thinking. It's not knowing why and how some of these things i remeber happened, that is going to drive me crazy. >.< and now i'm censoring myself, I really don't think i know how to be truthful. I aways tell bits and peices. it's part of what's lead to my memory proplems i think.
I watched Greg jump and start running, he was trying to slug me, around 6 years old at the time. Me and Greg were thick as theives our sisters the same way. I learned that day it was possable to do just about anything that needed to happen. some things need to happen for the future to turn out. if things are going astray something ussally corrects this. My understanding was that a human, in truth, had no future. short time on the rock unless you get kicked off early.

Specking of kicked off early we now interupte this random posting with a 1 week ODST marothon.

Writen at 4 am, Posted at 4 pm...

I'm haveing trouble finding music to lisen to. After hear a song enough i think what it means to me.

Walked around my good intentions
And found out there were none
I blame my father for the wasted years We hardly talked
Never thought I would forget this hate
And a phone call made me realize I'm wrong


Little be side it's 4 am and i can't sleep. I've grown to hate my family for the most part. but i wonder weather it's me or them. Am i to blame for the gap that is growing. I like to blame them. But i know better i know it's me.

Walked around my room not thinking
Sinking in this box
Blame myself for being too much like Somebody else
I never thought I would just bend this way
Then a phone call made me realize I'm wrong

When i'm in a crowd i blend in, I tend to lie and make myself sound as simular to those around me. After awhile being those people i can shunt it of and adopt a different persona, Calling up the old one if i run into those people again with just the name I use at the time. I don't think i really have any personalltiy myself except as a smart ass.

And if I don't make it known that
I loved you all along
Just like sunny days that
We ignored because
We're both dumb and jaded
And I hope to God I figure out

So i took off teh song 4 am by Our Lady Peace off my Mp3 player. To many thing are being remebered when i hear it. I wish i could forget. There was a time i used to Teir my memory to songs, certain kinds of songs i would use for different memories. Now i listen to the radio worried I'll start to break down.


I need sleep >.<